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20 April 2013 @ 11:15 pm
Not feeling emotionally good these days.... :'(
Feel that life is a mess.
04 February 2013 @ 10:09 pm
I am probably the worst person alive. Someone who makes use of her friends' kindness to run away from situations that I don't want to face. Someone who gets upset and agitated over the smallest things. Someone who thinks that life seems to be planned in such a way that nothing will go well for me.

That day when I was at my limits, i could pour out everything i want to say. It feels good to be honest about everything but it left me with even more problems. I spend everyday after that getting worried. "What should I do?" "Why do I have to be the one facing all this shit?" "What have I done wrong?" "Are people looking at me differently now?" "Am I hated?" These questions swarmed around me every single day. No matter how many funny shows I watched, how many games I played, how hard I tried to concentrate on revision, I just can't shift my mind away from these problems.

When I first step into this school, I told myself, "I will start anew, I will not look back to the past, I will change myself." Now what? I have totally revert back to my old self. But this time, I am weaker than last time. Somehow it feels like all efforts I put in to hide away that past have gone to waste. I get more sensitive now, getting weaker mentally than before. I am tired. I hate myself. 

Being accepted by a group, but yet my mindset is totally opposite. Negative things come to my mind so easily. What should I do to be stronger? 
26 December 2012 @ 01:58 am
Merry Christmas everyone :) 
Although I am typing this at this time when Christmas is already over.... my logic is that as long as I haven sleep it's not tomorrow yet.
oh well don't mind my nonsense but still, Merry Christmas!

My sister woke me up at like 10+ am in the morning (okay i know that's really late...) and after some preparations... me, my mum and my sis all head to the dog shelter at Pasir Ris Farmway!
It's my 2nd time here and for my sister, she is here to walk Hazel again! Along with her friends and cute doggies, we all walk to the dog park, a place where the dogs can run freely and play.
I get to meet the dog that I always wanted to meet as well... Yen Yen~ I love her a lot!!!! Heard a lot of stories about her and seen lots of pictures as well :) 
Today, I was allowed to walk Yen Yen back to the shelter from the dog park. I was really scared at first but after some guidance from my sister and her friend, I managed to walk her back successfully~ She is really good to walk! And she is fat fat short short one~~~ So cute >_< 
my sister says that my pictures does not do Yen Yen any justice cause Yen Yen is really cute... 
I have to agree OAO there's a picture of Yen Yen with a cute ribbon on her head!!!
And~ Yen Yen has a brother, called Tui! They are all fat fat but Tui is more active as in like to run~ Yen Yen just likes to sit down there and lepak ^^ But so cute leh... She is totally fine with me touching her! Super cute <3
I would love to come back and see you again ^_^

we had a mini christmas celebration.
Went Fairprice and brought some sushi home since it's sister's treat. But hor seriously speaking their sushi sucks except for maki. See all the salmon and hotate one so nice there in the end eat also no taste... Almost everything is tasteless sigh... Especially my favourite unagi super disappointing. Next time should just pay more and buy from a sushi restaurant >_<

I was watching Mei-chan no Shitsuji like halfway (actually left 2 or 3 minutes) then I suddenly heard a familiar voice at the door! 
it's Sherlin!!! Like siao lol 9+ pm still come!!! She brought me my birthday gift and christmas gifts for me, my sis and my mum!!! How sweet can she be! >_< 
We had a great talk at the balcony (with the rabbits) and in the room watching some funny Arashi videos! We also played the pirate roulette game and it's like damn crazy hahaha pop out for 7 times straight!!! continuous streak! Can buy 4D already!

We took polaroids as well~ Like an evidence of crashing hahaha >_< 
Really love the gift and thoughtfulness~ We are gonna be friends forever no matter what!!!! hehe~

Okay this post ends here!

Current Mood: coldcold
Current Music: AAA - Miss You
24 December 2012 @ 10:21 pm
Okay hello everyone!
It's Christmas Eve today and I have absolutely no plans and that's why I am siting in front of my computer right now! /sigh/
So.... let's look back to what happen during the entire year!!!

Grab some popcorn to eat and read!Collapse )
Current Mood: rushedrushed
Current Music: ARAFES LIVE
02 December 2012 @ 04:12 pm
Countdown to first CT paper : 6 days

I feel so shag, so tired, so lazy, anything but i just don't feel like studying... I totally get how the first semester will definitely be, get damn good grades cause work damn hard... Now I am like... lady luck please bless me during exam x_x 

It was my birthday a few days ago, I think it's the best one I ever had in my whole life. The main point of my birthday was that, for the first time in 10 years (primary school + secondary school), it falls on a school day! It was really fun~ I am finally not alone during my birthday ^^ Just that the bad thing was that I had to wake up before 6am for school and there's a quiz on excel that day as well. But putting that aside, It was great~ I love the company of people on my birthday~ /okay but for the rest of the year i would be complaining that why are there so many people here and there, i hate humans, i wanna be alone, etc./ Another thing was that, my friends surprised me with a rainbow cake at my house! Was really surprised and thought that I was gonna become a nyan cat for real after eating that. XDD It was really colourful and pretty huge considering that I have received lots of food as presents. I brought it to school the next day to share with my club mates~ ^^ 

Okay now I shall stop procrastinating and go do my work~~~ I must ace for common test despite how lazy I am right now I feel like rolling on the floor omg

Oh by the way, I am recently addicted to an anime called Sukitte Ii Na Yo. In English it would be, "Say I Love You". I think it's just me, I really love this kind of anime about a girl and a guy in a school setting. Maybe it's because I feel that I will never experience this kind of situation... althoughireallyhopeiwillgettoexperienceitoneday... 

Okay byebye~ for real now ^^ maybe i will post again after CT, depending if there's anything to post heh.
Current Location: home
Current Mood: lazylazy
04 November 2012 @ 10:11 pm
Tomorrow marks the fourth week ever since the new school semester!
Time passes really fast, and... I have caught the flu (once again) ><
I am not sure if this a trend because during the last semester, I caught the flu in like the first few and last few weeks of school. 
But oh well anyways, 
school's pretty much boring and fun, okay I got no idea how to describe school.
I have a new class with some people I know, and many people I don't know. 
New bullshit modules as well, like it's just crazy, the most useless module is at 8am in the morning and I have to wake up at 5.45am to catch the first bus. It requires me to brain storm and my brain is weak in the morning. 
I have a sport module as well, I got yoga! It's indeed relaxing but the after effects of stretching are like so.... sore....
During my first week of soran bushi practice, the aches were crazy but they recovered by the 2nd week, and then there's yoga which adds on and now it's sore again :(
Okay I got no idea what I actually wanted to write in this post ://///
Okay bye~
Let's survive week4!
Current Mood: hopefulhopeful
14 October 2012 @ 07:03 pm
7 weeks just passed like this. :(

although this is probably one of the more fun holiday i had, with events such as zoo, picnic, camp, soran bushi... okay lah this holiday although i never work at all... soran bushi was hella tiring but it's fun! looking forward to perform it one day! :) i am still working hard on ryokyshou-ing~ it hurts TT-TT 
30 September 2012 @ 01:31 am
Current Mood: excitedexcited
25 September 2012 @ 02:09 am
Had lots of fun during the camp! It's very different from other camps I went to, this camp is a lot less restrictive(?). Crashing other's rooms, going out to buy food, not sleeping at night... seldom do these stuff during camps ^_^ 

For the first time in my life (or maybe not), I slept on the floor with just a pillow and a blanket (which i would call a towel) in all directions which eventually led to insomnia. Toss and turn and toss and turn and goes washroom just because I couldn't sleep. I think I slept for about 1 hour on the first night, and 3 hours on the second night. The after result of sleeping 3 hours on the 2nd night is, I stayed half awake throughout =_=

For the first time in my life, I did so many embarrassing things just in 2 days. On the first day, there's night walk. Seriously speaking, I felt like I was a burden to my partner because basically I just screamed at everything that pops out of nowhere although he warned me that something will appear =.= It's like I know that it's gonna appear but I can't help but screamed. On the second day, we had Amazing Race, there was this station where people had to carry you up and you have to go through the tangled strings. So, I was lifted up by my GL and I was like /blank + shock + blank blank + scared + guilty + idk/. The entire moment is like... now.... in my mind for life, I can't even forget it. x_x it's like when I'm young, my dad or brother will carry me up to my bed if I fall asleep on the sofa (but that was when I was freaking light). now lifted up by other people, like weird lor... Next embarrassing matter, SKIT. I had to say "I AM HOT" infront of so many people. My role is already like damn minor compared to other people already... but it's so embarrassing that I just burst out laughing. When they showed the video of the performance again on the 3rd day, I heard the line i said and I hide my face and scream and I don't even want to watch my parts anymore /major facepalm/

Overall, the camp is fun lor! ^_^ JTC is filled with friendly people (It's damn true, if you want to compare to other CCAs.) 
22 September 2012 @ 01:51 am
Going for JTC camp for 3D2N!!!!!